My name is Cinderella and I’m an alcoholic.
I used to drink while dusting mantles,
but now I crave the fuels, hydraulic.

Hi, my name’s Rapunzel and I’m a kleptomaniac.
Below the tower, next to the horse,
are the evidence in haystacks.

Blue Fairy, here, with Tinkerbell! We love to gossip!
So we’re not actually here to share,
we’re just wagering in on toss-ups!

My name is Esmerelda and I’m here with my Aunt Wendy.
Tinkerbell promised a show,
so start whenever you’re ready!

My name is Sleeping Beauty and I’m a narcoleptic.
When Charming wants to kiss and tell,
I drug him with analeptics.

Hello, I’m Princess Jasmine and I have halitosis.
Aladdin thinks the rugs can fly
when my breath causes hypnosis.

Jane, here… and I brought my husband, Tarzan.
ran into Pocahontas, just ignore us,
we’re just early for a dinner plan!

My name is Ariel, they call me Little Mermaid.
I’m aquaphobic and obsessed
with singing when persuaded.

I’m Princess Megara, my hubby’s Hercules.
I ran away from Mount Olympus
and developed foot and mouth disease.

Hi, my name is Belle and I am claustrophobic.
I imagine all the furniture
poised in mixed spots of aerobics.

I’m Merida. Sorry for the knuckle-cracking.
My mother took my bow away,
but “‘Merica”, so now I’m packing!

Greetings, I am Elsa and I can’t let it go,
that every time I cook or bake,
the food transforms to snow.

Hi, my name is Anna, and I am Elsa’s sister.
I had some trouble with some boy,
so now the stable hand’s my Mister.

I guess my name’s Mulan. I like to wear men’s clothes.
I can’t tell my reflection
from the girl that it’s exposed.

Hello, my name’s Tiana and I’m obsessed with frogs.
But it’s not as bad as my cousin,
twice removed, and her obsession with the dog.

Hiiiiiiiiii! My name is Barbie!
Ken just dropped me off!
Yaaaaaaay! Tupperware party!

I am Princess Nala and I can’t hold a wand,
I initially was mad because…
…never mind, I’ll just eat this blonde.

Hi, my name is Alice. I fell through a rabbit hole.
I thought I saw the Queen of Hearts,
but I also just smoked a bowl…

Salutations. I’m Aurora. I’ve personalities, two.
My name is Sleeping Beauty
and these dwarves are all my crew.

Pocahontas, here, gathering you all as planned.
Forget the 60 minutes
and get the hell off of my land!

Response to this prompt. Basically, Princesses in group therapy. Not my usual theme, but the prompt was so alluring, I couldn’t resist, haha! Have fun!